Rejection is a hard pill to swallow, especially for me. I’m a people pleaser and fixer, I want everything and everyone to be happy and everything to be perfect. I don’t want anyone to feel out of place or feel as if they don’t belong! This can often lead to taking on too much because I have a hard time saying NO!
So when I am rejected by friends, guys or people in general I have a difficult time dealing with it. Even if it’s as small as a stranger giving me a nasty look passing by on the street or in the supermarket I take it to heart.
I’ll be the first to say I have an overactive mind, I’ll obsess over the smallest things. Going over details of a situation, picking apart where things may have gone wrong. It’s definitely mentally exhausting.
I would much rather have someone communicate the reason – however painful – why they rejected me, rather then invent my own reasoning . Maybe this is not for everyone, some might rather not know. I agree sometimes ignorance is bliss, but personally I’d rather know. Otherwise I will imagined 101 reasons why they have rejected me. None of them very comforting!
The other negative affect of rejection with no sort of closure is we often make the rejection about ourselves, and I am no exception. I’ll rack my brain wondering what it was that I did ….. did I talk to much, am I too fat, was I too silly, did I come across stupid, they thought I was boring, I laughed too loud and on and on and on!
So how do you cope with rejection? As much as I want to believe that its not about me, I can’t stop my mind presuming it is!
I’d love your feedback.
Alis Volat Propriis